Mary Arline (queen_of_kithia) wrote,
Mary Arline
queen_of_kithia

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Dance break!

So I was reading, writing and thinking about the quad controversy again last night, and it reminded me of something that I always think is kind of funny: one of the things Plushenko said is, to paraphrase: if you don't do the quad, now it's not men's figure skating anymore, it's dancing. And then Lysacek decided to compete on "Dancing with the Stars," which was probably a coincidence, but I kind of like to imagine it as his way of thumbing his nose at Plushenko and saying, "Oh yeah? Well, I'm going to go learn how to ballroom dance and I'll be the best at that too!" even though that really wouldn't be in character for him.

Anyway, somehow that led me to write an Olympic-themed parody of "Safety Dance" which I think is quite clever and which I want to write down before I forget it:
VERSE 1
You can dance if you want to.
You can leave Quad Snobs behind,
cuz the Snobs don't dance and if they don't dance,
well, they're no friends of mine.

You'll win gold if you want to
with technique that's well refined.
And then they'll act like they come from out of this world
left the real one far behind.
You can dance.

VERSE 2
You can go when you want to,
in a private jet you'll fly.
And Vera's dressed you neat from your head to your feet
and you'll surprise 'em with a victory cry.

Level 4 if you want to.
If you don't, nobody will.
Plushenko acts real rude and totally removed,
and Stojko acts like an imbecile.

CHORUS
I say, you can dance, you can dance.
Artistry and total control.
You can dance, you can dance.
Straightline step from wall to wall.
You can dance, you can dance.
Everybody looks at your hands.
You can dance, you can dance.
Olympian taking the chance.

Doing the skating dance. (x 4)

VERSE 3
You can quad if you want to,
if your foot is feeling fine.
If you don't abuse it, never gonna lose it,
everything will work out right.

I say, you can dance if you want to.
You can leave Quad Snobs behind,
cuz the Snobs don't dance and if they don't dance,
well, they're no friends of mine.

(Repeat CHORUS)
Tags: figure skating, music
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